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JukEboXAuDiO

JBX Graphic Designs
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Been A While

2 min read
Hi Gang!

I am not sure if anyone reads this but I am finally trying to get back into my DeviantArt. There are a few things I have done but not posted and I did get some new shirts. So what have I been up to the past year? Well after getting married we came home and worked our butts off. We were living with my friend and a friend of my wife's cousin which turned out to be ok. It was certainly fun when we were trapped in the house for a week because of the Blizzard. 

All that catch up stuff is kind of behind me. I retired from Day Of Defeat: Source a few months ago and I bought a new car since my car died back in November. It was rough. I loved that car. I bought a new one and I have started working on it to make it show worthy and fun to look at. We also moved to a new apartment and are finally by ourselves and it really feels good to begin our real lives on our own paying our own bills and working together. I can say I am so much happier.

I love waking up to her each day. It really is a wish and dream come true. I hope to show you more and tell you more of what I have been up to as well.

Hope to hear from you!
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Grinds My Gears (December 11th 2012):

Reason I don't like main stream hip hop right now: "Diced Pineapple" by Rick Ross.
Yet another Rick Ross song that's about sex and chicks not needing to talk. Song translation is the following:

Start of song. Random deft poetry about finding how deep your vagina is. Rest of song. You give me sex because we are fighting. I have a expensive car, in an expensive neighborhood, and I know celebrities. Refrain: I will have sex with you till your not mad at me any more. Next verse. I had sex with you and now your with me and I am buying you shit but I don't want you to talk, I just want to look at you. See refrain from above.

Outrage: REALLY? Didn't you make this song like 2 years ago? And like every other song you have ever made. Just changing the name and putting the name of the song in the deft poetry int he beginning does not make it a new song.

Song Title Definition: "Diced Pineapple"
If a girl eats diced pineapple, her pussy gonna taste better.

Translation:
"Yeah girl I fucked you and you tasted good. Yeah girl I am rich so get on this dick. Yeah girl if your mad at me I will just fuck you. Yeah girl I fucked you now I buy you shit and I only need you to look good and fuck me. Fuck yeah!".

Yup sounds like a typical mainstream song. Now think about THAT when your about to rock out to this song. And then think about the song before that? You sure it wasn't pretty much the same song just by someone else?
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Hot Damn

2 min read
It's been a while since I updated this crazy blog. I have been so busy with the wedding and this huge web project that I will hopefully get paid big $$$$ for. But between all the madness I got some new hardware, I have been playing Battledawn and have met an awesome group of guys and I am getting ready for a slow stress summer. I have some rants I need to put down on paper that I hope to share with you...... That is if anyone reads this. LOL

Biggest things since last entry......

Lost my grandmother to old age.
Lost my uncle to caner.
Lost my mind to my fiance.
Lost my loneliness when I found her.

I am excited for the end of this year and our honeymoon so I can finally sit back and relax and finally not have to worry about anything. I have gotten back into photoshop again. Been looking for some new inspiration. If I could only figure out how this stupid Rainmeter worked :shakesfist:

Either way my brother is going to show me when he gets home from his first year in college. Now I feel old. Until I have some real time to write more I will leave you hanging for now.

Please keep checking on me ^_^
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But its not.

My cousin and I told each other this the day of my great grandmother's funeral (if your remember it was a few months ago).

Yet needless to say the universe decides tear my life asunder again and pull down another soul to the darkness. My grandmother has passed today. I took the last picture I could with her this Sunday. Today she was to go to a hospice and live out her days there but she decided that she didn't want the family to bother to drive so far so this morning she let go. I kind of expected it this morning when I awoke and looked outside. Rain. Soon as I opened the blind and saw the gray I already kind of knew. My father would call later and tell me the news. She went in her sleep. Not 24 hours ago he would call and warn me of her state and where she was off to the next day. Yet after he called this morning a sense of relief had fallen over me. As though I had no reason to worry any more about her. That makes me feel bad but its the truth.

Yet there was more news from 24 hours ago....

My uncle had contracted both lung and brain cancer. What a week. Its like I'm drowning here a bit. And work is even worse with systems not working correctly but that is not a story for this forum. I sat at the dinner table tonight with my mother, my brother, my father, my aunt, and my 2 uncles (both my mother's brothers) and remembered the 12 years I spent living in her house. Where I sat, for i was sitting in a different place. Where she would be for my uncle was there. Where my mind would wonder and how I would pick on my grandmother and we would laugh later. So fragile she was. Then the questions pile up about my uncles and family and what will happen to her house (my home for 12 years)?

I can only think of my mother and how upset she is. Even worse my uncle who is on his way here who is also very sick and still having to deal with this. I am feel almost selfish to feel bad for myself. Thursday and Friday are the services. I will put on my senseless bravado to be strong for everyone else. I will carry her to her bed. I will mingle and talk. I will be the soldier that protects the family from utter and deep depression with my jokes and quips. These are my vows to this family for I feel that the ideas of god and higher power are wasted on me. Allow me to make those who are in pain happy so that I maybe happy myself.

Its almost 22:00. Time has slowed down and I am happy it has. Everything is quiet and I can hear the clicks of each key as I type this as well as the fan blowing air through my apartment. My ears are eating up the cool silence so my brain can relax from the constant problem solving, arguing, troubleshooting, and sadness.

The silence lets me think. The silence lets me write.
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Its has been to long my friends. I find myself sitting here at 1 in the morning thinking how long it has been since I have written to you. The funny thing is I am always hard pressed as to what to say to you. I yet I can remember that it is here that I usually express all of myself. Granted I like talking about there is something about the anonymity of a journal entry that makes things easier. Where to begin.

Angels Returning home
It has always seemed odd to me how one day someone could be a perfect 10 and then another drop to a 3. If you lead my last entry you say something about my grandmother. Let me fill you in. She was my Great Grand Mother. What a life she led. i can't tell you of all her stories because well there just isn't enough space on this journal but also its the Internet and people are sick. I will share with you one. She had not eaten an egg since the age of 12. You see she group up in the time where you had to go out and get the eggs from the hen house for breakfast. One morning on her trip back she tripped and all the eggs went flying into the air. When she fell all the eggs came hurdling at her. She had to spend the next few hours getting egg out of her clothes and offer herself. From then on she never ate another egg.

Thats an odd story I know but it has always been one of my favorites. Now though she has passed..... It is very sad. I told you in my very last entry that I would bring something to show you all as I have in the past. I did make something, but I am to make a liar of myself as I will not be sharing it here... at least not yet. This is a wound that will take a while to heal. And for many in my family its still a harsh blow as she was the glue that held us all together. I can tell you though who has seen it.

It has always bothered me how when someone passes away, how quick we are to bury them. Its very unsettling to me. I ask that to people and they say its because of how fast the body decomposes. I can understand the science but it just seems that we are in a hurry to get rid of them. I know its selfish but when these things happen I am never ready to go to the wake, or carry the casket, or drive to the cemetery, or have that awkward feeling of how I can't wait for that day to end.

Man Alive! Your 75!
Its always fun to fly. I have to admit. In fact I have so many frequent flyer miles I can circle the world at least 1.5 times by now. It has never lost its luster. Everyone has their own routine. Mine is get to the gate, find a computer/car/trucking magazine, flip through pages, put on the head phones, rock out, and get on the plane. I always take the aisle seat. Not a fan of the window, not sure why.... just aren't. But this was going to be a great trip.

My family and I caught a plane to the south for my 75th birthday.... surprise birthday that is. He was so surprised he didn't know what to say and to tell you the truth I am sure it knocked him on his ear. I have never seen him so happy. My family has always been very close and he makes it all that more fun with his shaking and Santa like demeanor and stature. Now to continue with those who have seen the special work I did for my great grandmother I will state this. My grandfather is one of 3 of her children. at exactly 6:00PM I gave him my present and told him it was imperative that he opened it at this exact time because you see, I had also given a copy of his present to his brother and sister with explicit instructions not to open it until 6:00PM that day. It was probably the best picture of my great grandmother we have ever taken along with a poem composed expressly by me. He weeped. Just as he did when we were together for her funeral. He then got called from his siblings and they all expressed to each other a better and more profound understanding and awareness of each other and felt just that much closer. What a way to celebrate 75.

Leap Of Faith & Suicide
Many would say that marriage is the end. Many say its the beginning. I find it to be a great step into and adventure to children, a great place to live, and never being lonely. I hate being lonely. More over I think that marriage is a changing constitution with the times. Though its a big, extravagant event, I find that the traditions have gotten out of hand and that personal flair does not mix well with the normal styling of the "traditional" wedding. I appeal to your wallet and tell you that most weddings costs in the tens of thousands of dollars in the U.S., of which I have tens of thousands of nothing even close to that. But besides the cost of the wedding, the endless messages of people wanting to come to the wedding; besides the stress of changing everything about life and the blatant enforcement of laws and statures about what to do and what not to do for a wedding, I bent down on one knee and proposed to the very person I both despised and loved only 1 year ago. In my own form of course, which as I will tell you, nothing to change the history books for.

If any of  you read my entry about how romance has been dragged out thanks to scores of movies and love stories adorning romance novels in paperback, I can tell you that when you have been with the same woman for 6 years you could grow comfortable with the way things are. That was the problem long ago so I figured I would change things up a bit. I did spend money on the ring. It was worth it to see her smile.... at least I think she was smiling..... there was more kissing..... Its all kind of blur at this point. None the less I can state that the nice guy (if that is what people call me) has finished last. Well not so much finished as can see the finish line. We aren't the everyday couple. We are in many ways exact opposites and I think we can tolerate each other, but where we connect can only be described as basic Nickelodeon cartoons, love of video games, obsession of our cats, and a carnal attraction to each others saucy curves and exciting angles.

In conclusion for now my friends, I reach out across the stars to give you a look into my life. If you have made it this far it means you can read a block of text and are still interested. Either that or I have bored you for the past 10 minutes. If I have please leave a message and I will refund that time with some funny YouTube videos or even a cheaply made flash game. Either way appreciate you following along.

Oh final thought. I thought I would get into this fad of having a blog somewhere like Wordpress or Blogspot. Its nice to have those things but in the end I have a DeviantArt with a journal and thats all I really need. So please stop by every once and awhile and check in on my work and of course these short transmissions of my life.

See you in the stars.
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Been A While by JukEboXAuDiO, journal

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